Thursday, January 25, 2007

Messages from my body

My body gave me a wake-up call yesterday. I got sick. I felt like hell and I had to leave work early. I won’t go into gory details because they aren’t important, but when I got home, I started thinking about what people told me: Enjoy being engaged for awhile.

I like to believe I am Superwoman. I can work my day job, do my side hustle, write a blog, hang out with my fiancé and friends and plan a wedding. Since I have been warned not to write about a current job while blogging, I don’t plan on saying much about mine. This is what I will tell you:

I commute about 1.5 hours a day round-trip (it’s LA –this is normal).
I generally start work at 9 and leave at 7.
Half the time I work through lunch.
I need to always be available for my boss (that sounds kinky, but it really isn’t).

In short, by the time I roll through my door in the evenings, I’m pooped. Exhausted. Worn out. There are nights I come home, make a bowl of cereal and plop on the couch for two hours watching reality television. Super Nanny? She has some good advice. Wife Swap? Those people learn from the madness (and hell no – I will never do a wife swap).

We got engaged on Christmas in Germany. I didn’t realize what a gift this was until I got home a week later. We arrived back in LA at 8pm January 1st, and I went to work on time January 2nd. As stated before, I am a planner. A giver of information. When I wasn’t working, I was on the phone telling people our good news. I might have even called a few from work, but probably not. So, in my jet-lagged haze of excitement, at 5am on the third day we were back, I managed to upload, edit and send out our pictures, which included the information that we got engaged. Even with this speed, I got calls saying, “I can’t believe you didn’t call me sooner!” Like when? From Germany? While I was sleeping?

In between those calls, I was talking with my mom and the wedding site vendor in North Carolina. When my sweet friends asked me about a bachelorette party and showers, I couldn’t even muster a little excitement. All I thought was, “One more thing to plan.”

We took some time on the weekends to recuperate. We slept the entire first weekend. He watched football while I read wedding magazines another weekend. What we didn’t do was take time to enjoy being engaged. We haven’t really basked in our love and luck in finding each other. I was already wrapped up in what favors to put on the tables and how to wear my hair. The wedding will come together because I am slightly neurotic and a little crazy with planning, but it doesn't have to all be done by the end of the week.

Yesterday, when my fiancé walked in with a bag of provisions for my sick self, it all sunk in. This is my future. This is my present. And I am so incredibly happy I get to do it all with him. We don’t live together yet, and I can’t wait until we do in April, but until then, I am enjoying my life just the way it is. We won’t ever be engaged again, and if my body continues working so well, we won’t be two for long either.

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